Why do girls worship Shiva to get a husband like him?
In India, it is widely believed that if a girl desires a good husband, she should worship Lord Shiva. Many girls pray to Shiva, aspiring to have a husband with qualities like his.
At first glance, this might seem puzzling when you consider Shiva’s lifestyle and appearance. Unlike other deities, Shiva does not adorn himself with gold, diamonds, or precious gems — he has no material possessions. He resides on Mount Kailash, a remote, icy mountain with a harsh environment, and often meditates in cremation grounds (smashan).
Fascinating, isn’t it? To understand why girls seek a husband like Shiva, one must first know who Shiva truly is.
Here’s my perspective on some of the key qualities of Shiva. This post is inspired by an incredible article I read many years ago in Gujarat Samachar, which left an everlasting impression on me. Although I can’t recall the author’s name, their words have stayed with me ever since. If this post somehow helps me reconnect with the writer, I would be delighted to credit them and meet them in person to rekindle my deep admiration for Lord Shiva.
1. Leader and Powerful
Shiva, also known as Mahadev (The Supreme God), is the ultimate deity in Hinduism. He is the destroyer of evil and the protector of the universe. Known as the ultimate warrior, Shiva possesses unmatched strength and strategic brilliance. During the battle with Tripurasura, a group of three powerful demons, Shiva demonstrated his role as the destroyer of evil and the protector of the universe. Using his unmatched strength and strategic brilliance, he crafted a mighty bow and an arrow powered by divine energy. He strategically waited for the perfect moment when the three demon cities aligned and then destroyed them with a single, precise shot, ending the threat to the universe. He is credited with teaching humanity various forms of martial arts, weaponry (including the bow, sword, and lance), and war strategies.
Girls often admire a partner who is strong, protective, and upholds justice and righteousness. Shiva’s warrior nature reflects his unwavering ability to protect his loved ones and confront challenges with courage and determination.
2. Committed and Responsible
Shiva’s unwavering love and commitment to Parvati are beautifully explained in the story of Sati and her reincarnation as Parvati. (Sati and Parvati are both different form of Shakti) When Sati, Shiva’s first wife, immolated herself due to the disrespect shown by her father, Daksha, Shiva was overcome with grief. He carried her body across the universe, mourning her loss. This act demonstrated the depth of his love and the pain he felt at her absence. Later, when Sati reincarnated as Parvati, she performed rigorous penance to win Shiva’s love again. Moved by her devotion and recognizing her as his eternal partner, Shiva accepted her as his wife once more. This highlights not only his devotion but also his respect for Parvati’s determination and individuality.
Shiva exemplifies the ultimate sense of responsibility by taking on the burdens of the universe to maintain cosmic balance. A profound example of this is when he consumed the deadly poison, Halahala, during the churning of the ocean (Samudra Manthan). While the gods and demons sought the treasures emerging from the ocean, the poison threatened to destroy all creation. To protect the universe, Shiva selflessly drank the poison, holding it in his throat to prevent harm to himself and others, thus earning the title Neelkanth (the blue-throated one). This act underscores his willingness to bear immense pain for the greater good and reflects his role as the ultimate protector of life and cosmic harmony.
Girls aspire to have a partner who respects their individuality while being deeply committed to his responsibilities. This balance ensures that both partners thrive as individuals while nurturing their bond.
3. Perfect Dancer — Entertainer
Dance is often seen as a form of entertainment, yet for Shiva, it transcends mere enjoyment. Despite being independent, powerful, the leader of the gods, and detached from material possessions, Shiva is a masterful dancer, often depicted dancing alongside Parvati in perfect harmony.
Shiva, as Nataraja, is the cosmic dancer who performs the Tandava, symbolising the cycles of creation, preservation, and destruction in the universe. The Tandava laid the foundation for various styles that evolved in Bharata, including Bharatanatyam, Kathak, Odissi, and Bhangra.
Why is this appealing: A partner’s mastery of dance reflects a sense of rhythm, grace, and balance, translating to emotional stability and the ability to navigate the highs and lows of a relationship with elegance and understanding.
4. Knowledge and wisdom
Shiva is regarded as the ultimate source of knowledge and wisdom. He shared profound teachings through the Shiv Sutras, and his discourse to Parvati, as detailed in the Shiva Purana, is considered a rich repository of spiritual and practical insights. Known as the founder of Yoga, Shiva introduced the world to the significance of meditation and inner balance.
As per The Shiv Purana, वायवीयसंहिता ( पूर्वखण्ड ) Shloka 23–30, There are 18 Vidyas, encompassing diverse fields of knowledge that serve as the foundation of life and civilization. These include the 4 main Vedas (Rigveda, Samaveda, Yajurveda, and Atharvaveda), the 4 Upavedas (Ayurveda — the science of health, Dhanurveda — the science of warfare, Gandharvaveda — the science of arts, and Arthashastra — the science of economics and governance), and 6 Vedangas (Shiksha, Kalpa, Vyakarana, Nirukta, Chandas, and Jyotisha), along with other fields like Mimamsa, Nyaya, Puranas, and Dharma Shastra. Lord Shiva is regarded as the originator of these Vidyas, symbolising the source of all knowledge and wisdom. By imparting these Vidyas, Shiva established the principles of governance, health, art, science, and dharma, ensuring the harmonious progress of humanity.
Why this is appealing: A partner who is wise, knowledgeable, and a guide in life is invaluable. Shiva’s wisdom ensures harmony, understanding, and intellectual compatibility in a relationship.
5. Equality and Respect
Shiva is often depicted as treating Parvati with immense respect and equality. This is epitomised in the Ardhanarishvara form, where Shiva and Parvati are represented as one being, symbolizing the balance and unity between masculine and feminine energies. Shiva is known as Bholenath, meaning he is kind and approachable to everyone, regardless of caste, gender, or status. He accepted offerings from both Devas (gods) and Asuras (demons) without discrimination.
Although Shiva has the power to defeat any demon, he empowers and encourages Shakti (Parvati, in her form as Durga) to take the lead in defeating them. He even bows to her in moments of anger, demonstrating his humility and deep respect for her.
Why this is appealing: Equality and respect are essential in any relationship. Shiva’s treatment of everyone as equal reflects his fairness and respect for individual worth, qualities that girls seek in a partner who values them for who they are.
Conclusion
These are some of Shiva’s remarkable qualities. Girls observe rituals like Jaya Parvati Vrat, Gauri Vrat, and the 16 Mondays Vrat with great devotion. During these vrats, they worship Shiva, fast, and practice strict self-discipline. Despite the rigorous routines, their faces glow with joy and devotion, immersed in Shiva Bhakti. In fact, they eagerly look forward to these vrats every year.
People often ask why girls undertake these practices while boys do not. That’s a discussion for another day. For now, let’s appreciate the dedication and devotion of these girls toward Shiva. Just as Shiva reminds us that, no matter how supreme he is, it is Shakti who completes him, may he grant us (boys) the wisdom to respect girls more and work towards making this world a safer place for girls.
